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Well I haven't updated for a few days as I have been researching so to speak. Well I was trying to hunt down reptilian shapeshifters, Illuminati controllers and poledancers. I have to be honest this isn't the easiest assignment partaken on behalf of my loyal readership but I have been moderately successful.

I have contacted David Icke regarding reptilian shapeshifters and asked him to direct me to the nearest ones locally. I remain confident that he cannot possibly consider me a crackpot loony as that would be 'Painting the kettle black' so to speak. He has though still to get back to me but I'm sure my boss is a prime candidate. He has shifty eyes, smells of fish and hisses under his breath a lot.

I haven't met any Illuminati controllers but have met quite a lot of Freemasons and people with freemasons as relatives. Freemasons are in my opinion are very similar to the Illuminati, perhaps one of the same or a poor mans not so scary version. I suppose working next to a freemasons lodge helped in this research but they wouldn't let me get further than the car park for some mysterious reason. I even gave the proper handshake, at least I was told it was the proper handshake.....

I have met some poledancers too. I didn't even have to part with any money in a sleazy club. I was a bit scared to ask some of them for a private show. Apparently poledancing is now the 'in thing' for keeping fit. Bring it on, poledancing is far more entertaining than aerobics classes.