Jobby Job Jobs

I have been a bit resting on my laurels of late even though I had decided the only way to possibly finance my extravagant lifestyle after the divorce and huge increase in bills was to get either another job or a better paid job.

I had been looking at Health and Safety jobs having completed my NEBOSH a while ago and having a fair amount of experience in the field (avoiding explosions in the lab and contaminating all of Nottingham with radioactive fallout, that sort of thing....)

Anyway, good karma having not actually even been looking for eons picked up a job paper yesterday and perfect job popped out at me. Unfortunately it is possibly the most ironic situation ever. It is working for the Driving Standards Agency and I cannot drive, not that I need to for the job but it looks a little strange being a non driver working for the DSA. Also it's a government agency, me working for a government agency, mohahaha, ah the seeds of chaos I could sow. Mind if they do any 'men in black' type checks on me I could be in trouble.

I'll probably have to sign some sort of official secrets act or something so I'll have to emigrate to France when I divulge all about corruption within the department.....

They might teach me how to drive for free though, something I've never bothered with as I have never needed to, and it's sort of politically correct in the green issue age now not to. Bicycles are better for you anyway, and I can walk to where I work in about 20min. I wonder if I could learn in some big black bullet proof sedan or something.

I could sabotage all the speed cams, and bus cams and in actual fact at this rate I'll never pass the interview, I'll be too busy scheming to pay the interviewers any attention....

Anyway must cut hair, dry clean suit and appear normal for a few weeks until I'm in, undercover so to speak.